Salisa lohavittayavikant

I feel pity for you also knowing that Russians are inherently not capable of having a genuine relationship that isn’t mutually exploitative or transactional or superficial or empty. I’m sure both of you have been trying your best. But add in the remarkable wealth and access you are just absolutely hopeless at it and will never know what normal loving relationships are like in this lifetime as with the rest of the world and you are too old to start over now. I mean what can you do with men who have never had any emotional or real substance to their relationship? Where do you even start with them? They don’t know what’s “normal”. They spend their whole lives living in such an abnormal culture so rotten and so prickly that even love and romance are pervaded with mild unpleasantness and unstated hostilities and dislikes. They don’t know how to process or express their emotions properly. They are clueless as to how to demonstrate care and respect for another person. They don’t even know how to separate what they “like” from what they “lust” after and always mistake lust for love and labour and suffer their whole pathetic little lives under that fact and even bring an innocent life into this world under that miserable condition. And they called that love and they called that family. Complete orcs, complete ogres. It’s not an overstatement. I definitely would not have wished that on my worst enemies.

A constitution so Russian you make yourself and everyone around you so miserable. A mentality so Russian you will never know what love is from the day you were born to the day you will die. Feel pity for yourself, won’t you?

The world might be better off seeing that kind of constitution and mentality completely exterminated. But I’m not supposed to be saying that. I’m supposed to at least remain impartial. But why should I be? After everything you have done to me and to innocent people around the world? Why should I be so impartial? So sympathetic? So understanding? Towards a bunch of ungrateful cunts with uncultivated minds and uncouth hearts. Why should I demonstrate my better nature when all you have done is to demonstrate your worst?

I do feel sorry for you because you don’t know how to think and act outside your own Russian mentality. Your culture is no help to you and one can even say it makes you worse off in a number of ways and that it fosters the worst impulses in you and fans that flame when given an opportunity. And that opportunity is so rife because you are so clueless and ignorant and incompetent to begin with.

One can even say it makes you mentally ill and morally evil. What’s wrong with just talking to me rather than hurting people? A simple “no” would have sufficed. Whether it’s “no, you cannot leave” or “no, talk to me instead of him” I would have been able to work with that and build on that. But no, no. You can’t simply talk to me. Whether it’s because you self-select dumb stubborn cows like Tatiana (aka stupid Russian bitches with low IQs) to be your girlfriends and wives or because all Russian bitches are like that (dumb stubborn cows with low IQs which you so worship being stupid Russian cunts such as yourselves) you simply cannot vocalise your likes or dislikes or emotions or anger like normal human beings but have to lash out violently like dumb despicable beasts. There’s no getting anywhere with men or women like that. Stock too rotten. Maybe time to empty out the said stock. Because you are not just hurting yourselves or hurting one another among yourselves but other innocent people and outsiders who don’t wish to have anything to do with you. You have your rights to self-determination as long as you don’t brutalise others who are not your own. But you can’t even bring yourself to not do that. That would be against your cultural grain, wouldn’t it?

It’s true that some group of people simply don’t know how to act “human”. So it’s a good thing you don’t interbreed with the race of people who do. The incompatibility is so profound it would have been bestiality proper.

“Speak, damn beast!” That’s what everyone wants to see you do all this time. With spoken words, comes reason. With reason, comes understanding. Of your own mind or that of others. But then again the so-called Age of Enlightenment didn’t actually sweep that far East of Europe.

But then I shouldn’t let my hatred for your race overpower my consideration for you as a unique individual in relation to me. But we all know that’s just my mind rationalising the situation I’m in. In any case, I cannot help you overcome your stupidity at the end of the day. What I think and feel has no bearing on what happens to you. What you do to me, however, does. You could have been let off easily all this time if you’ve just treated me properly. But then again, being Russian you don’t actually know what that means. So we’re in a bit of a pickle, eh?

I’m sorry. Was the Empire State Building you? How many times do I have to say to you that these oblique grand gestures are not helping your case given the situation and how I’m fed up with it? Am I supposed to feel delighted and giddy completely ignoring the fact that you’ve also killed people because of me? Do you have the habit of playing house with the psychopathic gold-digging status-obsessed women much? Your “Russian” approach only works with the fellow Russian cows, you know that right? With women raised without values and morals which is to say every woman in your country, right? Do you think you can come to understand what “values and morals” I mean when you’ve been bred and brought up without them surrounded by people also outrageously lacking in them your entire life? I’m being mean to you again, aren’t I? Do you think I’m exaggerating when I say that probably nearly all Russian women display what can be classified as disturbing psychopathic behaviours? Same with the men? Even more so with the men? Do you think normal healthy people like me could grow to love psychopathic people like you?

Your grand gesture might be appreciated by women brought up within your own psychopathic culture embodying the fuck-all grandiose narcissistic attitudes especially if it privileges them and disadvantages everyone else. We’ve gotta state outright at this point that Russian culture is indeed quite psychopathic if not fairly psychopathic. Dominance and exploitation without any regard for others in the service of one’s ego. You both have exhibited clinically psychopathic behaviours not just in your line of duty but in your personal life towards others close to you (for example, me). A fellow psychopath would find your devotion to me charming regardless of how you treat others especially those not in close relation to me. Anton thinks I should fall in love with him despite his heinous treatment of women. Only narcs or psychopaths (or in this case fellow Russians) would be capable which is probably why he’s been getting away with it his whole life. You think I should fall in love with you despite what you’ve done and the moral qualities you don’t exhibit. Only narcs or psychopaths (or in this case fellow Russians) would be capable which is probably why you’ve been doing it and won’t stop doing it. I do understand that Russian people lack moral values and personal ethics. They don’t essentially care about anyone or anything at large in any meaningful way. Not as long as it benefits them. But I’m not like that. I’m not from your culture. You don’t get this. Which is why the behaviour of the other side is always going to puzzle you. You and your 1D psychopathic worthless culture.

But I’m sure you’re trying your best and that’s gotta count for something. I’m still alive even after all this. That’s gotta count for something.

I do not know what patterns of behaviour you expect from me. I’m from a different culture that’s prosocial instead of antisocial. Don’t you think that counts for anything?

Sadly you can never interpret my behaviours objectively or in a psychologically sensible manner that fits with my personal temperament. You can only do so from your own cultural lens which is to say narcissistic and antisocial and exploitative and transactional. You do however probably hope that love will transcend all this. But love does not exist in the vacuum. Love is shored up by little acts and little thoughts that are intertwined with and expressed through one’s cultural and personal make-ups. But your personal views and treatments of me are always going to be coloured by your cultural understanding of people as you know them and your own cultural behaviours as you exhibit them. One can even say how we relate to one another is “culture”. How you choose to relate to me (within your Russian culture) is never going to be exactly how I relate to you (within my Thai and Western culture). That’s where misunderstandings arise.

Having said all this, I still cannot help you. I don’t know how to and maybe I don’t even want to. But just know this: I want you to act rationally in the way that you can which best benefits your country. I guess I’m really not going anywhere as long as you’re still alive. Maybe we’ll get to test that theory one day sometime soon. I don’t look forward to it though.

I don’t understand why we can’t talk it out. Most of the other side is always going to disregard what I say and do because to them it’s extreme coercion and they are against it on principle or they are against you on principle right from the start and this only incenses them even more. But there’s probably a fairly large number of people who are pragmatists and soft liners who deal in real(geo)politik and this thing with me is so cocked up they hate to have anything to do with it being on pins and needles all the time. Not to mention it’s so goddamn nonsensical and tired. I think your paranoia and distrust of people and your psychotic behaviours of over-reaction and over-retaliation against me and everyone else certainly makes everything worse and worse. You don’t know how to make things “good” between us. Only how to make them worse and how to blow things out of proportion when they don’t go your way. That’s the defeatist negative Russian attitude in you. You don’t know how to stabilise and repair the situation as needed. You don’t have the skills needed to socially recover and reconcile because Russian emotions run on the extremes. The way infant emotions do.

And you make everything worse by withholding all forms of communication and all kinds of affection with me. Which is why I cannot help you. I don’t even understand you.

You wearing your invulnerable armour and projecting invincible strength as per the psychopathic Russian customs (which is stupid by the way) is doing the opposite of endearing you to anyone. It’s doing more harm than good even though it’s probably your only (peaceful) way out of this. But I cannot talk a man out of being Russian. I’m wasting my breath with you.

Besides it might just be too late. You might have unleashed epic fury on a grand scale and there might not be coming back from that. I hope that’s not the case though. But again, there’s not much I can do. You murdered monks. On pilgrimage walking barefoot on the searing asphalt in deep meditation as the ultimate act of faith and self-sacrifice. How do we even come back from that? And why on earth? Why would you do that? I wish I could say it was false flag to sow anger and discord but you pinged my inbox that morning. After my messages to Sebastian. After learning about the Empire State Building stunt just right before. So of course it was you. And you wanted me to know it was you. But why? Why go through all that trouble? Why won’t you just talk to me? A simple “no” would have sufficed, you know that right? Two little characters on the screen instead of a self-indulgent act of hateful sadism. I mean, why? It’s so senseless and nonsensical. If that’s not going to anger everyone then what is?

And how many times do I have to say I’m not fighting you? You don’t extend me an invitation. You don’t talk to me. You don’t talk about me with other parties who are genuinely concerned for me and my wellbeing, do you? You won’t acknowledge what’s going on even, right? Still total plausible deniability, correct? It’s deliberately provocative, isn’t it? Do you think my heart is still in it with any of this with you at this point?

Does doing any of this make you happy? Or make me happy with you? If not, why do it? It’s like Anton and his little fault-finding behaviours wanting to quibble over Andre or men’s penis size which is to say over nothing at all. It’s a self-defeating and relationship-destroying act that amounts to nothing good or positive in the short term, medium term or long term. Is this what a Russian relationship looks like? Miserable alone, miserable together? And you think your race and your people are remotely capable of knowing what love is?

— Salisa to Путуки, July 8th, 2026

Sweetie, I don’t want to override or contradict or speak for the entire diplomatic corps and Sinologists who populate your rank and file but.. are you doing these things in China? The Chinese are cautious and clever people, you know that. They are extremely circumspect most of all. Whatever it is you’re doing is not going to win you any favour with them and is actually anathema to the Chinese ethos. You can always reason with people, any people, however dire the situation is. I genuinely believe that. So whatever is distressing you, there must be better ways than demonstrating force and alienating them. Hearts and minds, do you know this phrase? Goes for allies as well as populace.

Don’t you know this was how I knew something wasn’t right with the Nong Bua Lamphu nursery massacre? You must have witnessed this. My video call with my Aussie partner right after it happened and my attempt to convince him that it didn’t pass the smell test. “Why did he burn the white truck it made no sense? There’s no way a Thai could have done this. It’s not in our cultural DNA. I don’t believe it. It must have been staged. No way in hell.” He dismissed it at the time but I read all the details to the letter. Thais are inherently not capable of an atrocity of this magnitude even if he was on cocaine and mentally ill. Don’t you know that the most individually anti-social act in all of Thai history was the cannibal killer named Si Ouey? That was just about it with the Thais. All the mass shootings at shopping mall all those years ago seem highly suspect as well. It’s like you transplant an anomaly of one culture onto another where such an act is almost inconceivable and entirely foreign to our way of life. I know my culture and my people well. Being prosocial is in our DNA. China is not that far off from us I don’t think. That doesn’t explain the cultural revolution but then again I’m not a Sinologist.

In a lot of Asian cultures collective harmony and social order are highly valued and truly antisocial acts are rare. So you must not alienate the Asians in this way. We abhor these actions through and through. The West probably not so much, but in Asia you have to be careful with your violent outbursts. We who value the collective over the individual cannot stand them.

The thing is Si Ouey wasn’t even Thai. He was a Chinese migrant and my point still stands. You are alienating me with your antisocial behaviours. I am deeply Thai beneath my Western veneer. I am Buddhist by upbringing and you are not winning any favour with me.

In our old literature like Khun Chang Khun Phan there were men who were antiheroes or lotharios or swashbucklers and there are reasons those stories are not being taught in Thai schools at all. They are considered immoral and so learning about them is forbidden (maybe not explicitly but it’s heavily frowned upon for sure). I think in the past thirty or forty years the Thais have revamped their male ideals and cultural icons. Classic Thai gentlemen are cleanly dressed and polite to a fault. If you watch Thai lakorns from the 1990s to the early 2010s the male protagonists are so prim and proper they fade into the background of the drama. It is the women who wrecked their havoc and the men who were mafia. After 2010s the cultural landscape was heavily influenced by Korean and Japanese imports. The male protagonists started having some personality and flavour and quirks to them. The women still continue to browbeat everyone on screen. These days young men I see on TV style their hair like they are Koreans and dress like they are hip hop stars. It is a great tragedy and I miss classic Thai gentlemen with their civilised parlance and demeanor and mannerism.

I have seen historical Chinese dramas in passing. Very popular back in the days. Isn’t that how they portray the classic male ideal over there? Have you ever seen them? Civilised restrained chivalrous courageous polite bordering on mute. That’s what I can recall from my hazy splotchy memory anyway. So whatever behaviours you are projecting will not sit well with a group of people who grew up valuing heroism and wisdom and civility above all. You should not go against their cultural grain.

I think antiheroes as heroes is still largely a Western phenomenon and a very recent one. In Asia especially prior to Western and Hollywood influences trickling in there are clear moral storylines and black-and-white good guys vs bad guys and not just in their fight against one another but in how they treat a female protagonist. Basically you are acting like the bad guy in every Asian movie and tv show ever made not just in your general behaviours but also in how you and your men treat me. Asian men are much more chivalrous than Western men when it comes to women and you always have to keep this in mind. Women are greatly valued across Asian cultures. You have to understand where they are coming from.

What’s with your yacht in the news? I’ve made up my mind to find my way to the West and you have two days to make an overture to me or we’ll see each other on different sides at the end of this. It’s up to you. It’s always been up to you.

— Salisa to Путуки, June 29th, 2026

But is that love? Or is that stupidity? On my part and on yours? It seems like stupidity to me when someone could have just made that indecent proposal that has been staring us in the face all along which would have legitimised this morally dubious and questionable “relationship” for all parties involved and brought everything to a happy end. Do you know that movie from the 90s? I believe it was Demi Moore and Woody Harrelson and Robert Redford. I believe he offers her $1 million dollars. How much is that these days adjusted for inflation?

Can you believe if there is at least an ounce of brain cells in one of your dulled thick skulls that would perk up and say: why don’t we throw a million dollars her way and save our country tens of billions of dollars a year? I would have taken up on the offer. Not per year but a lump sum for the rest of my life because I’m that cheap. So, say, a net loss of $1 million across the ten years period because I would have been thoroughly used up by then as opposed to $10 billion across the ten years which computes to about $100 billions or 8 trillion rubles. But that is an overly extravagantly optimistic envelope calculation of losses that tickles all our fancies. How much is the loss again? What is a hundred billion minus a million? About a hundred billion? The exact figure is ninety nine billion, nine hundred and ninety nine million. But again, too optimistic and we all know geopolitics is a capricious creature. What about just for one year of sanctions? $10 billion minus $1 million is $9.999 billion. You would have saved yourself about that much. But it is not what this is all about. What this is about is love. Love is immaterial. But stupidity is not.

But that wouldn’t mesh well with your genetic and racial make-up, would it? It’s never about a mutually profitable trade but dominance and escalation and retaliation and control. That’s not strength. That’s stupidity. You can never elevate yourself to think objectively about any situation but always have to lead with domination and control. No matter what. No matter the circumstance. No matter the education or temperament or social standing of the man involved. You always have to bully and intimidate others to get what you want in life. That’s what makes you essentially stupid as a race.

Intelligence would be losing a million dollars some time in the past year which is just your spare change anyway. Stupidity would be losing ten billion dollars instead. 10,000x the amount. That’s how much not having a brain cell costs. But I’m sure you feel real strong and smart and on top of the world right now. The world laughs at you and your complete mental retardation.

The best your people can be is to be outwardly and superficially friendly. But what you couldn’t be is generous or kind or reasonable or fair or intelligent. Because you can’t respect others but seek to dominate them. One of you could have, at any time in the past eight years, made a decent proposal to me with unstated indecent elements and I might have taken up on it. Especially after everything started going wrong I would be forced to take up on it. But no, no. That’s not who you are. You have to stalk and coerce and rape me and kill and brutalise and terrorise others because that’s who you are as people. You couldn’t have gone about it the clean way, the smart way, the easy way. And if I were to reject you outright with the right kind of threats and the right amount of pressure which you have been so fond of reminding me of them every two weeks I would be forced to go through with it whether I like it or not. Hell, I even offered myself up for free to make it all stop. But that’s not good enough for either of you. You have to brutalise and terrorise me and others some more because that’s who you are. Even with guns to all your heads you cannot bring yourself to think rationally or act fairly or behave decently. It’s not who you are at core. Which is why you can never love but exploit each other under the guise of love. Which is why you are physically violent and morally rotten as a nation. […]

And would anyone blame me? If I were to take up on the proposal? It’s not illegal even though it borders on prostitution but they would have to understand and accept it. It would turn it into an economic arrangement instead of a hostage situation and everyone would be relieved at least and that would be the end of it. And I’m not making any headway with you with all my one-sided conversation, am I? You still don’t know how to communicate with me. You don’t know what the expectations are. What the thoughts are. What the concerns are. Even when I’m helping you. I’m typing them all out to help you. And you don’t respond. You choke up. You get confused or threatened. You really don’t know how to conduct an actual human relationship establishing genuine human connection with another person who isn’t a 1D Russian who understands things only in immediate, non-mental terms. You are completely non-mental without the psychological and emotional and intellectual layers that make up the rest of the human world. […]

Which is why I’m bringing up the money. It’s the only terms in which you can understand and relate to me it seems. You can only understand things in clear, material terms so now I’m shifting my stance. Because there’s no more to you than that which is why my questions and thoughts and concerns I have outlined to you fall on deaf ears. You don’t understand them. They are confusing to you. You don’t think about them. You never come across these issues and expectations before in all your impoverished life with other fellow Russians. You and your 1D thinking find me and my 4D life utterly baffling and foreign. It’s all very new to you, isn’t it? To have actual thoughts in your head? About things in your life? You can understand money in your pocket and body in your house ready to service you. You cannot understand, for example, the financial investment my family has made in me and the future and life they expect of me. You cannot think of family. You cannot think of other people. You cannot think of the past. You cannot think of the future. You cannot see connections between them or make correlations between them. That’s too abstract and foreign and overwhelming for you. You cannot think at all about anything worth thinking about. You can solve technical problems because technical intelligence and textbook education exist across all cultures. But to be able to “think” proper about “things” proper that don’t exist in the classroom? You’re stumped and baffled and lost. […]

You have no thoughts in your head that would enable you to grapple with the complexity of the situation. At the political or domestic level. You are simpletons. […] With the lack of brain matters you have to compensate by browbeating others like a pack of animals in order to get what you want. Because you cannot think at all about anything essentially worth thinking about. You cannot understand anything about humans or human relationships or difficulties and vulnerabilities that come with conducting a relationship with other humans. There’s no point in kindling social affinity and interaction among your kind when individually you are psychologically lacking and intellectually empty. You cannot expect empty beasts to educate other empty beasts. That would have been a project doomed to failure. […]

You don’t understand why people, especially women, want to be financially responsible and independent. It’s just “oh, they like money”. That’s the Russian in you. You can only think of things in pure surface-level and material terms. It’s never the joy of work, the competence and skills we showcase, the brain we sharpen and put to good use. For you, it’s just “money”. It’s never about being respected by other people, responsible for your loved ones, or admired by or proved useful to society. It’s just “money”. It’s never any difference the well-earned money from hard work or easy money from whoring oneself out. It’s just “money”. It’s just that to you. Money is money and there’s nothing more to it. It doesn’t speak of anything and has nothing to do with anything else that goes deeper than the transactional value of currency. Because you are non-mental. There are no mental aspects to you. There’s nothing about society, about responsibility, about mental or moral development of a person. There’s nothing about meaning, about potentiality, about utility, about worth or value. You are not capable of thinking of these things in these terms because you are a Russian. These ideas and concepts so interwoven with one another and so saturating the cultural and intellectual landscape of the rest of the world are entirely lacking in your mind. Because you are morally and mentally and intellectually and socially undeveloped as a race.

Me wanting money will just be that to you: me wanting money. It’s never about legitimising the relationship so the world is off our asses. It’s never about making this thing palatable to foreign governments who are already sick of us and want to steer clear of our business. It’s never about compensating me for what I’ve been through or proving to others that you have acknowledged your wrong. It’s never about ensuring that I have a secure future ahead of me when you leave me and throw me aside and we know you will (you will go back to whoring about town […] sooner than we think regardless of your grandiose self-delusion and discourse about “love”). It’s never about compensating for my lost wages or loss of economic opportunities in life when I give those up to be with you. It’s never about compensating for the rape victim and the coercion and bullying and brutalisation you have continually and sadistically subjected me to. It’s never about compensating for your repeated attempt to talk me into killing myself and taking my own life. It’s never about compensating for the profound psychological damages to not only me but those of my family and loved ones who you have drawn into all this. It’s never about any of that with you. To you, it’s just “money”. Money, money, money. That’s all you can think about in your thick Russian skulls. “Women want money. They all do. She wants money from me. I’m right all along.” Because Russians are dumb and stupid and can only think of their penises and their wallets. They cannot think of anything that’s not completely material and superficial. That’s why Christianity is never going to ennoble you. Worthless shit race of humans. […]

How much do you think me gambling my physical, psychological, emotional, sexual, reproductive, financial, existential safety to be with you is worth? What’s the figure you find acceptable? Take into account that I’m not an air hostess or a dancer who makes shit money living shit life or living off my family. That I’m a breadwinner for my aging family. Have you ever been bothered to think of that? My aging family and disabled sister? How much would you compensate for a lost precious year away from my parents who are reaching the end of their lives in the next two decades or less? And I have to move to be with you away from them in another country? I have to sacrifice years away from my family for you? And I have a disabled sister to take care of for the rest of my life? Do you think of her? When you leave me finally to go whoring about town with expensive whores all over the world, what’s to be of me and my sister who I’m financially responsible for for the rest of my life? But I’m sure in your head it goes “Money, money, money. Women want money. Girlfriends are expensive. Whores are cheaper”. That’s because you are a Russian. That’s all you are capable of thinking about. You can’t be bothered to think about the “shit bitch” of a mother raising your own child. You probably went: “She wants money from me to raise the child whom I fathered. What the fuck? Shit women. Women want money. Money, money, money. Whores are cheaper”. That’s because you are a Russian race. Russian men like you cannot think about responsibility or duty or accountability. They cannot think about other people only of themselves and their feelings. They are fucking snowflakes. They lack care and compassion towards other human beings including their loved ones and their own families. That’s who they are as people. Garbage race. Garbage people. Garbage nation. They always exploit others. Always. A fifty year old highly educated successful Russian man is just this and nothing more. He’s reached his moral and intellectual development fumbling about the low ceiling his nation and his culture set for him.

So how much do you think I’m going to give up my physical, psychological, emotional, sexual, reproductive, financial, existential safety and security to be with you? That’s seven dimensions, no? How much do you think I can live with? Are you going to let me earn my livelihood? Is it going to be slavery proper that is? Am I going to be compensated for the rape, the catastrophic trauma, the economic and financial loss for the past year and for the rest of my future?

Maybe my story is worth more to the Financial Times or one of those investigative tabloids, you know. Maybe my story is worth more for Hollywood. Maybe I should be thinking about money for real. Because a fortune could be made of my story.

What did Netflix pay for Prince Harry’s documentary? Can you look it up I forgot? How many millions? Isn’t my story even more explosive and expensive than his? Bruh, who cares about Prince Harry when you’ve got one about Putin and the head of NSA equivalent? How much do you think me sitting in for a hundred-hour interview with Netflix would be worth? If I think about money, money, money, I should be thinking of that, no? Are you smart enough to catch up with me, sweetheart? Or are you just as dumb and thick as always? As Russians always are? […]

If I were to defect to the West, would you let me tell the world of our story? We can leave Putin out of it because that’s a red line I will never cross. But you? The secretive head of FSB cyber agency who turns out to be Nakamoto? The Bitcoin founder? How much can I tell them? How much can we make public? How much can I profit from it all? That’s money, money, money approach, darling. If I think about money, money, money, I should have gone about it this way, no? Am I obsessed about money? Or am I smart? Is it money or intelligence? Is it money or drive? Is it money or independence? Is it money or justice? Is it money or revenge? But I’m sure with all the considerations of money, intelligence, drive, independence, justice, revenge in play, you can only think of three things: money, money, money. […]

And I’m sure the Russian government would never intervene in our affairs and would just let me blab away everything to the public. Even though they are directly culpable in all this and behind all of it they are going to gather around their thick collective skulls not to discuss governmental responsibility and compensation but retaliation and escalation. You would, wouldn’t you? You would secretly intimidate me and everyone into silence so I keep my mouth shut? You wouldn’t acknowledge the wrong or compensate me financially even if it’s a drop in the ocean and it would have brought everything under wraps for everyone else also but you would start a widespread campaign of large-scale violence against foreign citizens especially the Europeans and the Americans? You would choose intimidation and violence over reconciliation and responsibility, wouldn’t you? Because that’s who you all are. You are not intelligent. You can never be intelligent or fair or responsible. Because you don’t actually possess a brain. Or a heart. Only a violent kneejerk reaction. Because you are dumb and brutish and slow. […]

Maybe I shouldn’t do all that for money, but for justice. For revenge against a cruel stupid race who kill people over nothing at all because they lack the human qualities in them that make existing in the society in relation to other people intolerable and excruciating. How much are the resources of your country worth? How much the Western corporations and elites stand to gain? If my story proves explosive and damning enough maybe they will take an actual harsh apocalyptic stance against you finally. Not because they are moral but smart and opportunistic just like me. Think of how much possibility my story opens up and what good that would do them.

Maybe Germany will finally hit their recruitment target finally. Maybe NATO alliance will finally be strengthened. Because it’s not just violence that people find damning. For god’s sake even Trump was fair to Melania and treated her decently instead of unfairly and abusively and inhumanely. He has all the money in the world just like you. And he went about it the generous and fair-minded way with his wife whom he loves. But what about you? The two smartest most elite Russian men running your nation? You two would make Trump look like Christ in comparison. Can you imagine over a decade the tabloids and the newspapers running all those stories on him and his past history of women and how the entire nation derided and looked down on him because of that? Worst president ever? And then there’s you two. There’s […]. Who is ten or a hundred times worse than Trump in his treatment of a woman. Whom he claims to love no less. Trump didn’t love those women. But you love me. You two love me. That’s an even greater crime and monstrosity. Trump will emerge as a saint by the end of all this. And maybe those working in the Trump administration for the economic and political goals will finally feel relieved if not vindicated and morally superior. We are fighting actual bad guys. Who rape and brutalise women whom they love because they cannot love and they cannot care.

But why talk about all this when I love you and you love me? And your friend loves me. And it’s love, love, love all the way through. How did the talk of money and expectations, being treated decently and fairly by you, and tipping the global geopolitical scale with my story come into the picture all of the sudden? Just as it was with you. It was never about the oil sanctions and the assassinations and the mass casualty and all that follows or how all of that could have been avoided with a simple financial offer to me coupled with some light threats or simply treating me humanely like I’ve been begging you to do in these past months. It was about love. Love, love, love. Love through and through.

— Salisa to Anton, June 28th, 2026

Is this the unanimous and final stance of the Russian government as to its intention and goal? We must not operate or make decisions based on hidden feelings and conjectures and assumptions without examining the facts of the case. I want to get rid of feelings and conjectures and assumptions that have been plaguing us all, and bring facts and proven demonstrated actions to the forefront. Other government officials need to act in this way and if they deem your intention outright hostile instead of misguided, deceptive instead of genuine, vengeful instead of hesitant, they can act accordingly and make the right political or diplomatic decisions in regards to you and me and the Russian government and its people. Maybe they will choose to declassify and make this whole thing public after all if it serves an agenda that fits them. Maybe they will finally work up the courage and ask Lavrov about it on camera and plaster it all over headlines and social media. It shouldn’t be a decision to take lightly. Therefore we need hard facts and conversations not light humours and insinuations.

This is not a threat. You will be tempted to interpret this as a threat or as me hardening against you and so you need to harden back against me in response (not the kind of hardening I want with you but it is what it is). But I can assure you that this is not the case. You would be surprised the amount of rationalisation and justification a human mind is capable of spinning to refuse to acknowledge something essential about themselves, be it feelings or vulnerabilities. I also need to know what stance I should take towards my Russian neighbor. Should I start vandalising his property? Poison his dog? Take the kitchen knife over and stab him in his face? Luckily I banged up my wrist pretty good last night hitting things including myself and have now lost some sensation in my right hand and will struggle to hold a knife firmly in my grasp and do ungodful things to anyone.

But here we are back on feelings and conjectures once again. We should avoid that and face the situation squarely and factually and proceed on from that.

[…]

For example, I will not take seriously what or who Anton refers to as “enemies” (full phrase: “superior enemies”). That is what I mean by feelings and conjectures. They are just that and nothing more. His lack of engagement with me or response to me on the other hand is a hard fact. We take that into account. We can almost say that what he is doing is a form of play and provocation. That he has no genuine romantic feelings towards me only hostile and vengeful tendencies. Romantic man courting a woman wouldn’t go about it in such a way. Lording his control over her while refusing to engage with her or placate her or talk to her. It is mental and emotional torment and nothing more or less.

I need to know what your genuine intentions are as demonstrated by hard facts and real world actions and not what we, altogether or individually, presume them to be. I need to know what feelings to have towards you personally and how to go on from here. That would change everything. I wouldn’t be aligned with or sympathetic towards you anymore and perhaps that’s what you have wanted all along. Here is another instance of feelings and conjectures but human reality is full of them. You would be reluctant to accept the insatiable needs for revenge against the most minor slight (me writing all this out in front of everyone can be perceived as a slight against you, because you cannot think objectively or act fairly, only feel subjectively and act petulantly) as something inborn within you but see everything as a form of provocation that then justifies your tendencies to be violent and cruel. You always see something lacking or devious about me and will go out of your way to interpret any of my actions however harmless as a betrayal against you and you use it to justify your violent and cruel behaviours towards me. When in actuality, you just want to be violent and cruel because that’s who you are. Your ongoing treatment of me and by that I mean refusal to engage with me while having me believe that you are genuine or intentional with me can certainly be interpreted as part of the cruel and violent campaign against me. We all choose to act in good faith believing it is misguided love and obsession that have gotten out of hand. But what if we are wrong? That you deceive everyone including yourself and you don’t even know about it.

[…]

No one could save you and you can’t even save your own nation. You choke again and again. You want to see it self-destruct, don’t you? You gotta hate them. The damn Russians. They tried to kill your wife and daughter in a car accident after all. They are a stupid race. They are mean and cruel and backward. You secretly hate them, don’t you? They wouldn’t let you resign and live your life in peace but keep you in this state and you couldn’t get away from them. The first time you wanted to get away from it all was over twenty years ago. You have been trying again and again but to no avail. Even the President of Russia is under their thumbs. The goddamn Russians. And so you are subconsciously trying to bring it all down and go out in a blaze of glory.

— Salisa to Путуки, June 25th, 2026

Your “0%” answer? So casual and so smartass? Is being registered by all government agencies around the world, my idiot darling. And what do you think they think of your answer? That you really are not serious about me or care about me or seek a peaceful resolution with me and have no intention whatsoever to treat me decently and humanely and kindly. They probably think it’s just a game to you. A sadistic twisted enjoyment of a Russian rapist slaver. Of course I know that’s not really you or all you. But people can certainly think in a way that’s not fair to you but truthful to the situation. But being a Russian, you don’t care or know what other people think or feel and how what you say comes horribly across to others. And so this continues to be painful for everyone. For me, above all. Because I’ve tried my best only to see my efforts sabotaged and shat and spat upon again and again. I do wonder what’s the point of all this I’ve been doing?

It’s a good thing I write all this out. To draw an emphasis on the mindset and the lack of bureaucratic caution and professionalism, if not also collective stupidity and cowardice, of a group of arguably the most powerful men in the world.

You know, you all may have seen me gather stuff around the house today. Solid, spiky, heavy, fragile, flammable materials. I thought of even hurting the damn dog for god’s sake. I think I’d cross the line with everyone if I were to hurt a dog. But then what about my bunnies? What if they starve to death because I cannot afford their food? I think about hurting an innocent man. An innocent man who was pacing back and forth one day around the neighborhood visibly upset and gloomy and brooding if not also shaken who could barely look at me in the face after it became clear that this whole thing went above you. I could still be hurting him. Or at least breaking his window (I thought “should I bring a chair over because the garden bush is quite tall and I can’t make a good aim at the window on the other side of the fence from the ground?”) and dumping my smelly garbage all over his lawn and even finding my alcohol stash useful (I’ve always been scared of flicking a lighter for some reason but I don’t think that’s going to stop me given my momentum). But then it occurs to me, “why am I doing this over a confused old man who couldn’t even work up the courage to talk to me?”. Then there’s you. Hopeless idiot that’s going to make matters worse no matter how hard I try. It’s not really a tradition of my culture or the more enlightened Western culture for a girl to be abused silly by her lover and not making a fuss over it. Over there in the primitive bushes of Eastern Europe it is probably expected there to be some form of physical violence in a domestic situation. So in all your eyes I’m probably getting off easy enduring verbal and emotional violence from my Russian rapist slaver pig. But elsewhere this isn’t acceptable either. It’s in no way acceptable and all the other people around the world already hostile to you find it morally and ethically repulsive. […]

It’s not worth becoming a crazy person over a man who has failed me and everyone so fantastically. What’s the point? Is he even worth that much?

That’s how I regulate myself sometimes. God I love my brain. Saves my bacon many times.

[…]

You know, in a way, I am perfectly content and restful in my daily going-about knowing that the worst possible outcome for me is having to ask someone to loan me money to keep myself afloat. I’m sure I can find a few willing donors with some pocket change. Whereas you and your current homeground predicament? Ooh nasty. Whose fault is that? Whose is it? Really think about it. And don’t point your damn dirty little finger at me. I’ve done everything I could. You cannot help a group of retards so hellbent on hurting themselves and each other in one giant self-loathing orgy.

So what happened from my Moscow trip up until today? What is it that goes on in your head? I think you all are suicidal. That’s grand. It is what it is because what you are is stupid. You cannot help a stupid race when they’re too stupid to save themselves with all the generous help in the world including from me.

I do wonder how much your “0%” offhanded response is going to continue hardening the resolve on the battlefield for all the top brass on the other side monitoring us and might even tip the scale of the few sympathisers you have remaining towards viewing you as reckless and irresponsible and cruel. But I’m sure to the dimwitted Russians that doesn’t mean anything for anyone and nothing is essentially being registered by your thick skulls. But I can assure you, it means a great deal to everyone else what you say to me. So in a way my laughing at your answer probably wasn’t me appreciating a good jest but me enjoying the Schadenfreude in a sadistic triumph because you keep digging for yourselves your own little graves without even knowing about it.

— Salisa to Anton, June 25th, 2026

Characterless people like you and your race aren’t going to be able to appreciate people with actual character no matter how hard you try and however much you think you do. It doesn’t work that way. […] It’s the emotional and mental and intellectual and moral qualities that even the scale. You can never grasp it intellectually or feel it emotionally what actual character is or how that’s good for you. It’s a culturally and socially learned thing which being born into a character-less and value-less culture makes you crippled for life. And so it makes this whole thing much more entertaining and delightful. All of this trouble of an extraordinary if not existential scale for something you can never know or appreciate? Greek tragedy of the most epic proportion. LOL.

You’re gonna think I’m too much of a “hassle” and not “worth it” and much less agreeable than a common street whore. You’re going to fall out of “love” with me real quick when reality hits you in the face. Because you’re a primitive race who still believes in “love” as it does in “God” which is to say as if it means anything to you aside from a murky concept that engenders temporary delusion and makes you blind to everything else that has nothing to do with it which happens to make up all of it. So we’re going to call it quits in less than two years believe it or not. No problemo with me. You’re going to leave me worse off in life emotionally and financially and psychologically than if I’ve never met you. Which is to say you’re going to effectively ruin my life. Which is why a trip to the British embassy is the most attractive option to me at this point.

Living a 1D life of money, looks and status isn’t going to make you capable of appreciating someone who lives a 4D life of intelligence, kindness, humility, passion, love and success. Because you don’t know what that is because you’ve never experienced it. And because people around you don’t manifest it or embody it in a way that’s perceptible or valuable to you. That’s why you keep talking about “inner” beauty or spirit in grandiose terms without knowing how this translates into a real world phenotype and how it manifests in different people in different ways. The grand and the abstract cover up the lack of the actual and the concrete. That’s because it’s all fuzzy to you being from a 1D world looking onto 4D people. And it isn’t just something to grasp intellectually. Your mind and your body have been programmed since birth to feel a certain emotion when coming across a certain trigger, and you will be hard-pressed to interpret a certain trigger (my action, mannerism, thinking, feeling, preference, expression) within your own narrow 1D framework without being able to correctly map it along the 4D dimension. Unless you learn to successfully acculturate into another culture that has refined thinking and feeling and being and that often takes a few full years to five years at the very least, we are going to keep clashing on non-matters and misunderstand each other all the time no matter what you do and however hard you try.

And you’re never going to be able to understand me and who I am in my entirety of being. My personality is more on the fringe even among the 4D people. You’re never going to get anywhere with me it’s sad to say.

But the least you can do is to show some basic kindness and consideration. That often connects people across cultures around the globe even if attitudes and mentalities and values and morals don’t match. But you struggle with that all the time and all the more when it’s particularly needed with me in this state and the world in the same prickly fragile state. Everything and everyone in tatters and you and none of you could be bothered to extend some basic courtesy or consideration towards anyone else including among yourselves. It’s a sad, sorry condition.

And so people become incensed not just by your treatment of me but you and your treatment of your friend and your men and your country and your friend’s treatment of me and you and his country. What’s wrong with presenting a unified front? Just get me anywhere and ration the loot of war among yourselves and as I’ve made clear to everyone I have no real problems with that. Yet you have to expose your infightings to the world and so the smallest crack in the armour spurs on the greatest strength of the enemies. Warfare 101, darlings. Where have you all been?

So in a way you can frame all this as a show of weakness brought on by stupidity and vice. Selfishness at all costs regardless of who suffers including one’s friends and one’s men and one’s country. But the real underlying cause of all this is the failure of basic kindness and compassion towards other human beings be it friends or enemies or innocent people or one’s own people. The biggest and deepest and grandest moral failure of all time.

— Salisa to Anton, June 26th, 2026

Although we incorporate the “Chinese Banquet” dining option into our wedding ceremonies, ours is primarily Buddhist-influenced and retains the traditional flavour of the local inhabitants. Basically there are monks chanting and blessing, a thronged procession to the bride’s place of residence (usually with a banana tree), and like Songkran you get people wet…

— Salisa to Henry, February 21st, 2026

I’m not a botanist but.. did I see some banana trees near the Kreml? That’s just about the only plant I can identify I’m afraid.

And bamboo of course! After all (la)bubu is a panda ❤️

— Salisa to Путуки, June 15th, 2026