Salisa lohavittayavikant

And you brought him into my life to begin with! You’re responsible for him raping me and stalking me and abusing me. Yet you choose to do nothing about it. You have chosen to look on without offering me a helping hand or a refuge or protection of any kind. And you claim to love me? In what way is this love? If this is love, then it means Russian men aren’t truly capable of love. Or care. Or decency. You leave me to fend for myself! A defenceless vulnerable girl against an all-powerful man who raped her and hurt her over and over. And you choose to stand by and watch! The girl you love! […] Men across the world who don’t even know me care more about me and my wellbeing than you did. They try to protect me from Anton more than you ever did. They fire missiles for me while you can’t even lift a finger to accomplish the same goal.

— Salisa to Путуки, June 26th, 2026

How many times do I have to say: don’t displace, don’t outsource, don’t insinuate, don’t postpone, don’t be oblique? If one of your two Kremlin cucks wants to say something to me, they can say it directly to me. How many times have I said this? How many times have you all been dunces and dimwits about it? Who wants to be a queen to a bunch of dunces and dimwits? That’s like residing in majesty over the fake-ass Potemkin village. You all don’t need to remind me how flaky your big fannies in charge are whom I have to deal with everyday and how you have to groom me because you’re too fearful to talk sense into them. This is probably the norm for you but it just enrages those who don’t live in your society and possess none of your mentality. I bet this is why diplomacy has never worked in your favour in the past few decades. It’s frustrating and exasperating dealing with your kind of usual bullshit. I mean, I’m usually generous with people’s limitations and deception is the name of the game but good lord it is so pure senseless retardation sometimes. It’s like “why?”. Why don’t they listen? Why don’t they get it? Why don’t they respect decorum and customs and decency? Why do they behave this way? Why are they so confusing and confused? Do they even understand human language? Can they make inferences from what you say and gesture because inferences make up the bulk of human comprehension whereas actual words and letters count for very little? How do you even begin to bridge that gap between these incomprehensible senseless brutes and the rest of the world?

I think Bubu Dudu memes reappearing set me off more than anything. Like, why? Get it together, will you all? At least with me and Anton we’re moving on from what it was before and you could see us softening up for a proper opening. But with your friend, it’s like we’re back at the beginning of it all over and over again. Like why? Didn’t I tell you just a few days ago I couldn’t bring myself to do it anymore? If he just wants my attention, now is not a good time since I’m repairing things with Anton. If you want me to see him, you know exactly how you can bring that about and ultimately it rests on me whether I want to take up the offer but you know what you could do to bring it about. But you’re not doing that. Instead you’re back to grooming me with the memes and it’s like “why?”. What’s the purpose of it? What’s the use of it? Do you guys ever think anything through?

And all the extra fluffs and love messages, what’s the purpose of it? I don’t want to see them. I don’t even know who’s behind these things. Is it Anton’s friend? That would make some sense. If so, I don’t want to see them. If you want to see me to repair things, take a leap of faith and man up for once and do what you should have done for the past six or so months. I even flew to Moscow for god’s sake. Now you want to sabotage my chance with someone else to make yourself feel better about your own cowardice which is just another face of the same cowardice and a continuation of the same cowardice? And what did I say about all this? You have all the power to make the polycule happen if that’s what you want. No one’s stopping you. No one can stop you. I even proposed it myself only to get the heat from Medvedev, didn’t I? And I asked you to solve the problem of Anton. Silence about that too. Like, what do you want? Do you even know? What can you live with? What are you even doing? I’ve been trying to help you all this time. On the romantic front and the geopolitical front. And what did I get? Hesitation and radio silence and violent carnage. Like why? What for? What is going on? I already said to you, and I’ve said everything useful under the sun, that people can tolerate ruthlessness to get what it is that you want, but they cannot tolerate ruthlessness over hesitation and confusion and inaction and inability. And you don’t care what unnecessary mess you’ve made in the process. You’re not a strong person. You exist in a system that never nurtures true strength and ability. And we all know why Anton here has been put in charge of his own domain all these years. He’s spineless and he reveres you. He even said so himself about never becoming an actual threat to his superior. And you’re his superior, aren’t you? You could have him killed anytime, couldn’t you? You could punish him insidiously even if you couldn’t, could you? So why is this still a problem? Why didn’t you do anything before when I was willing? Are you afraid of fading into the irrelevant background again, aren’t you? You don’t know what it takes to be happy and you don’t even know what happiness is even at the epitome of power and wealth and access and you have everything at your disposal to obtain me for yourself and you can’t even do that. Like, what is this? Can anyone help me make sense of things? Didn’t I also say that you could relocate me to Moscow out of the generosity of your heart with no expectation in return and if you want time to work up your magic or courage you have all time in the world and this problem of me would be half-solved because I’d have a good life over there and people will come around even if they’re not happy with it? Wouldn’t that give you enough space, give me future and happiness, give everyone else a sufficient reason to back off and your men a room to breathe easy? Incorporate what it is Anton wants and we might just find a golden mean of a solution. Have you ever thought this way? The middle ground? The essence of the Buddhist soul?

And you have to think in the extremes and act in the extremes while being unsure what it is you want and unsure of how to bring it about with ALL the resources in the world. That’s just hateful. People loathe whatever it is you’re trying to do and whatever it is you’re trying to project. It doesn’t look good, I can tell you that. It hasn’t looked good from the start with the […] and the […] and all that jazz but this has gotta be worse. This is what happens when men don’t have to reason about their motives or their actions. When they don’t have to justify anything to their wives who are second class citizens or their men who are way beneath them. And so they lack the ability to reason altogether. To know themselves altogether. To be coherent and intentional altogether. They just react reflexively for the most part because they can. They lack the rational faculties to engage in a bargain or a negotiation or a compromise or even to understand others from their own points of view. They lack the emotional faculties to understand themselves and regulate themselves because they always externalise their inner turmoil with actions to punish or silence others. They lack the moral conscience to reflect on how much all these sinful “privileges” strip away all that makes them human – cooperative and rational and moral. And this is why nothing I’ve said and nothing I’ve done landed with you and I have said everything useful and done everything helpful, everything literally under the sun in the way that I can, but none of it is obvious to you and none of it resonates. You just don’t “get” it. The same way Anton doesn’t. And you don’t listen to anyone after decades in absolute power because absolute power engenders deafness and stupidity. It’s like, nothing I’ve said has ever been registered or comprehended or acted on. That’s what you get for being part of a culture so uncooperative and irrational and amoral. You lose the essence of what makes a human being.

You may not realise this but people fundamentally despise things that are not rational or coherent. Your mind. Your action. Your decision. Humans are rational beings? The keyword is rational. You’re not being rational. You don’t even know what it is to be rational when you never have to be. When you can always mum the final words and people automatically fall in line. Or you reason badly like Anton did without the rational, emotional, and moral faculties that would have been developed elsewhere to help him reason better and more clearly and holistically and compassionately. And you’re not restrained or respectful because you never have to be. Combine the lack of rationality and restraint and respect and you have something akin to a Russian psychology. And you embody them all too well above the herds you rule over and the system you’re trying so hard to preserve. What good would come out of it? Trying to preserve that which hurts you and dehumanises you and others in equal parts? Like, I get it that you all have been adversaries for nearly a century and you cannot trust them who try to undermine you, but do you ever wonder why? Because they are hostile and greedy and rotten? That’s what you’ve been feeding your populace but I want to know whether you actually believe it. Is that what you actually believe? I mean, their behaviours are, in appearance, those things – the way they are projected and understood by you – but do you know what their deeper motives are, in essence, and in what place they originate from and with what principle they take shape and develop? Sweetheart (apologies for using this word again), you’re smarter than this and you’re better than this. I don’t really know what’s what in this information fog of war and what’s from your posse and what’s actually from you but I think you’re truly misguided and misunderstood at quite a fundamental level. Everyone misunderstands you, that much is obvious. But you are misguided even with such genuine intentions for your country. That’s gotta be a deep painful realisation knowing that the system you’ve been trying your whole life to protect ends up eroding all that makes human and all that makes humans happy and thriving and prosperous.

And you make no sense at all. That’s why I’m fucking angry. I try so hard to understand you because understanding something helps you hate it less. And I don’t want to hate you. I’m not in a position where I can hate you without the gnarly gruesome consequences and that’s why I don’t and you can even say it’s the only reason I don’t. But you’re pushing it with all these things you’re doing. I get that you’re pathologically obsessed with me and nothing you do makes much sense because it comes from that place of vulnerability and fear and longing and loneliness. But as I’ve said, I’ve done and said everything under the sun to help you. Those advice still stand, don’t they? They are still applicable and useful, aren’t they? You’re never going to listen to them, are you? Then piss off, will you?

Where have you been all these six months? I persisted with you knowing it could have fallen through by the end of it but I still did it, didn’t I? How many times have you failed me with your inaction? Five? Six? This is what you get with rich men they’ve become so complacent and thoroughly stupid and irresponsible and childish and they suffer no consequences for their own inner lack when they benefit from the external abundance. Also, a giant brothel is your country. Here in Thailand we’re known for that, an unfortunate consequence of our Vietnam military installations but it’s limited to the paupers and the actual pimps. Not so much over there from the elites to the middle class to the hand to mouth it is a cultural thing to take a man for what he’s got and not who he is and a woman for what she’s got and not who she is. That’s literally what prostitution is. […] But Russian stupidity prevents you from seeing that clearly. See? It makes me rage dealing with someone so silly without any perspective it’s so stupid it’s astounding.

And I had to battle my actual visceral fears to come see you, do you know that? And what fears did you battle keeping me at a distance all this time? Man, I’ve never known, throughout my life, men as weak as you and men as weak as Anton. And not just weak but also stupid and fearful. And can’t you see outside yourself and your feelings just for once? Can’t you see me? Innocent people? People who get hurt in the process? All because of you? No remorse about them either? No care for them either? Like, what? What is this we’re dealing with? Are you even real?

You have no mental fortitude. You mistake aggression for fortitude the same way you mistake aggression for strength. And you have no understanding of anything or anyone outside your own self. Anyone else would have extended a hand to help regardless of how they feel and what have transpired because they could see how much I’ve taken in and how much I’ve endured and how much I’ve suffered and how much I’ve persisted through it all despite all that. Even if they can’t care, they’d be able to appreciate my efforts intellectually and respond to it in kind. That’s not kindness, that’s understanding and responsibility. But you don’t even possess that. You don’t understand anything. You’re not responsible for anything or anyone. This is the kind of men your system and your culture breed, can’t you see that? Aren’t you ashamed of that?

— Salisa to Anton, August 10th, 2026

Did I tell you there was a restaurant with a beautiful glass house called One & Only just across the street from here? Didn’t you call me that once in your writings? You didn’t own the damn thing, did you?

I’m not a shrine you offer tributes to. Worse than being on a pedestal is being a damn shrine as if I’m a thousand years old and not a real person. I’m not to be cherished in spirit or in memory. I walk, I breathe, I feel, I hurt and am hurt. I’m an actual human being.

You cannot blame me for failing to show an appreciation for your devoted idolatry when you don’t tell me of these things. And what woman wants to be worshipped in idolatry and in name and in name only? Believe it or not even porn stars and Hollywood starlets want to be treated like they are human beings first and foremost and women second and what they do for a living third. You spent too much of your life living in that lonely, depressing country where people worship idols and cartoon fantasies are a billion dollar business. It’s childish and idiotic. It makes men socially inept however polite and respectful they may be. Men over there are so terrified of women they masturbate to paper characters and collect anime figurines wearing a sexy, revealing outfit. Personally I find that uniquely disturbing and insulting. The way I was insulted when it turns out you didn’t know anything about who I was as a person. And so you misinterpreted everything I said and did and got angry over nothing because you didn’t know how I would react to things and how I would behave in a certain situation that’s in line with my inner temperament, my adopted values and beliefs, my lived history and personal experiences. You weren’t curious about me as a person. You weren’t interested in me as a person. To you, I was just an idol. A projection of fantasy. A shrine. You think I like having poems penned in my name which was why you kept doing it and you were doing it for months and months. But why do you think that? Do I actually? Because I’m a woman? Do most men like having random fangirls write them poems devoted to them personally? Do most women with random men? Especially when there is little to no shared history between them? Don’t people just find that creepy? And say women are charmed by it.. but do I? Me? Me. Not some random woman or an average woman or most women. Me. It’s me you’re interacting with. Me as a real person. As a personality. Not as a personage and an idol. You’ve flattened me beyond recognition to the point where it stops you from being curious about me at all. Which is what relationship building is. You haven’t been building a relationship with me. You have been building a shrine for me. And I don’t think most people like that, be it women or men.

You cannot blame me for failing to appreciate what you’ve done for me when it is YOU who failed to learn what it is that I appreciate and what it is that I don’t. You missed your marks. It is as simple as that. That’s what one-to-one conversations are for which was something we didn’t really share in Phuket. And do I look like someone who is susceptible to believing that everything around me is a sign from the sky carefully orchestrated by a star-crossed lover who is actually my soulmate? Because that’s just dumb. It offends my deepest inner being to be dumb. To be delusional. To be erotomaniac. You bank on me being delusional enough to buy into your romance scheme in the shadows. That’s just the opposite of who I am. You missed your marks again.

I’m explaining to you why I didn’t bring it up sooner. One and Only for example even though I suspected that one probably ten months ago. But maybe it’s been your plan all along to astonish me as well as to destabilise me. You want me to be unnerved and unsettled. You want me to have a unique experience no one else in the world could deliver. And for that, you may have just won me over with your madness.

But that’s not what I want from you. I don’t want grand romantic gestures in the shadows or out in the open. I want someone who demonstrates care and affection. You don’t have to be overly affectionate. I don’t like affectionate men. I like thoughtful men who are deliberate and intentional with the things they do and say. Not men who casually lie or disrespect me all the time. I want someone who understands me when I say, “you keep fomenting our antagonism towards each other by your silence and distance” and then actually does something to improve the situation. Not someone who gets hurt and defensive taking to twitter whinging and wringing their hands in despair. That’s avoidance. That’s immaturity. That’s undependability. Women just want grown men, dude. At least women from the civilised world. I don’t know what it is that goes on in your part of the world. No wonder Andre and his ex-wife who should have been a beautiful couple by the world’s standard fell embarrassingly flat on their ugly asses and were bafflingly clueless as to why that was. They don’t call you primitive savages with a primitive conscience for no reason. Men and women lack a great deal of what’s human in them. They lack the intellectual acumen and psychological understanding and moral responsibility and human compassion. For example, they would think that your grandiose romantic schemes alone should blot out everything that’s happened between us since then. They would think it should be enough. It should count for everything. Everything else is irrelevant. And that if I were to put up a resistance then it means I am ungrateful or deliberately and provocatively playing a game or playing hard to get. They couldn’t bring themselves to think beyond these simple pain points because they are not capable of thinking beyond them. And this has been what underlies our friction and tension and contention all this time. You interpret everything uncharitably and limitedly because you grew up in an uncharitable limited culture among uncharitable limited people. People whose understanding of themselves and others is constrained by their impoverished one-dimensional thinking and behaving and co-existing. But I’m back on insults again. That’s not the vibe and tone I want to lead with today.

I’ve already said this to you and it quietly incenses me when what I say is not being registered by my partner. That what you’ve done so far has earned my attention and that was the major part of why I tried to engage with you last year. But the engagement then fell short. Very short. To be fair as I’ve said we were overwhelmed and stressed out by what was going on around us. Things have calmed down since. I want us to try again. I don’t think you’ve been deliberately cruel. I think you lack the confidence from your anxiety especially towards me. I think you write to recover and re-project your invincibility because that’s the stupid Russian customs. God forbid the Russians ever develop self-consciousness in some form.

Do you know that emotions can be calmed and placated and understood and modified whether by the person experiencing them or the person experiencing them with? Emotions are not a natural order of things where they get emitted occasionally like the sun’s coronal ejection and there’s no more to it than that. That emotions are somehow experienced by the person emoting them and that’s all that there is to the entire process. In a socially intelligent world, emotions are shared, registered, reciprocated, ameliorated, understood by another person especially the one responsible for them. That’s how humans bond. I would say that’s the only way humans can bond. Emotions are not meant to be experienced in isolation. And that’s why you write. Because your culture does not permit it otherwise. And the people within it do not have the means or the skills or the knowledge to deal with them intelligently and kindly and effectively. But that’s not to say the rest of the world is like this. And I don’t want you to think I’m like this.

You’re going to have to start talking to me though. You don’t understand that the more you don’t, the more I see you as being terrified of me. Which is okay, but then you don’t get to keep me jobless and poor because you’re terrified of me. You have no rights to keep me jobless and poor to avoid dealing with your fear. You choose your fear over my future and comfort again. In the same way you chose your fear over my safety and wellbeing when the limbs of your friends started to fly. You choose to cling onto your fear. Why? You’ve been doing it forever. When are you going to stop doing it?

I believe in you. No one does though, but I do. Doesn’t that count for anything? Are you going to choose your fear over me?

I know you don’t appreciate me. If you do, we wouldn’t be like this. Not talking. You do not appreciate how much work I’ve put into myself over the past year so I am able to speak with you in calmness and with clarity and on an equal footing with you for the most part. Because that’s what you want. I know that’s what you want. You seem to be able to only grasp tangible things – restaurants in my name and words on your twitter – and not the patience and understanding and kindness required of me to deal with you throughout all our extraordinary ordeals. This is because of the non-mental nature of a Russian. Which is why I’m saying: you don’t appreciate me enough. Because you don’t see it. Because you don’t grasp it. Because you need your 4D glasses.

You want us to have a flawless love story and happily ever after, right? You fear of things going wrong and not being able to measure up to a neat faultless ending in your head? That’s a very primitive way of thinking. You think it’s romantic and quixotic and legendary. I think it’s infantile and unrealistic and delusional. I have enough emotional capacity to understand what real life between two people entails. Do you? You have been in serious relationships before, correct? It would be quite insulting if you assume I am defined by my young age and so you fear of disappointing me playing house with each other. I think we’ll be fine at the end of the day. You shouldn’t overreact at the slightest hiccups as you have been. You need to learn to mediate yourself and regulate your emotions and hold yourself to a civilised standard of behaviour. People think it’s your personal defect. Personally I think it’s cultural. It’s so cultural it’s so obvious. In some very undeveloped cultures, men are not capable of controlling their emotions be it anger or desire. They have no mediation within themselves whatsoever. They do not even have what is called “emotions” proper. They have what is called “feelings”. Mediated and processed feelings constitute emotions. Emotions are intellectually understood as are the circumstances surrounding the emotions. The cause, the context, the resolution, the solution. Feelings are mere senses in our body registered by our brain. The cause and nature of such feelings are obscured. They come and go. There’s no rhyme or reason to them. They arise and they die down. They are never properly dissected or understood. In some cultures, people experience mere feelings but never emotions.

And you don’t understand how much I’ve mediated and regulated both my feelings and emotions when I deal with you. You don’t. Why would you appreciate it when it’s a behaviour so foreign to you? And this is just the emotional layer. Then there’s the moral layer. Why? Why am I doing it? Out of duty? Responsibility? Sense of right and wrong? Sense of mission? World peace? The moral layer then informs or shapes the emotional layer (it is this that’s deeply lacking in your culture). Then comes the intellectual layer. How I went about doing it. If you noticed, I started watching Fear Factor early this year. Do you know why? Then I started watching Love Island. Why do you think that is? Prior to this I’ve curated my playlist to mollify my own feelings and behaviours. Do you even know I was doing these things? Do you think they are simply random happenstances? That I just do them because I feel like it? Do you think I am in any way like you and your people who could barely be said to possess any emotional layer to begin with?

If you want to recognise my efforts, here’s your chance. I took time to explain to you all these things because we need to know of them so we can move forward together without much friction. As I’ve said before, if you were to be born in the West with the parents who were raised to be kind and insightful, you probably wouldn’t have to suffer much at all as a hypersensitive extraordinarily intelligent individual. And if your Western parents were crap or even abusive, you would have friends and teachers and communities of people who would be more than willing to provide you moral and emotional support as well as intellectual understanding. You’d grow into yourself by 25. You’d find a female peer of equal standing who could understand you and nurture you. This is the NORM in the West and elsewhere. Instead, your culture and people are so dim and dumb you are still this way in your 50s. You’re not a difficult person. You’re that 15 year-old self who grew up in a primitive backwater with no real knowledge or insight into anything that matters and so never properly matured as a person. You never learned to respect others, value honesty and integrity, denounce force and intimidation and inequality and injustice. And so you’re misshapen and miserable. You have no tools to navigate life, no emotional capacity to endure hardships though life is full of them, no social abilities and support to make it bearable in the short term or the long term. The fact that you date low-value chicks who are essentially uneducated and uncouth says all about how uneducated and uncouth your culture actually is. It’s so stupid it’s astounding. This is probably because intelligence for the Russians never translates to real intellect and insight and knowledge and wisdom and kindness and understanding. Moral and intellectual layers are sorely lacking. Emotional layer barely half-formed. It’s like witnessing you lie, lie, lie so compulsively and then bitch, bitch, bitch about how your relationships are unhappy and never enduring. It’s so stupid it’s astounding.

And it wasn’t until I came across your two other friends that I realised: it’s not just you, it’s all of you. Because given all your personalities and your educational and economic opportunities in life, it shouldn’t have been this way. There’s no way it could have been this way. The lacks are so prominent and consistent and profound. And that’s when I realised the culprit is the culture.

What do you want me to say to your shrines in my name? Do you not understand why I’m angry because of this? What does that accomplish? What does that have anything to do with me? Why didn’t you tell me? You cannot blame other people for not “getting” you when you don’t try to convey clearly to them your intentions. You cannot assume people will just “get” you. Don’t you learn this by now? Does your culture not teach you this? Does your culture not teach you anything on how to get along with others and co-exist peacefully with others? Why is everything so senseless and silly with you? And it’s not just you. With your friend, it’s the same problem all over again. You don’t think the Americans and the Europeans gang up on you because you look different from them, do you? You all look literally the same to me. So where’s the tribal animosity from? Any ideas? It cannot just be ideological and historical at this point. I can tell you, you are so different from them in the most unpleasant ways possible. The Americans have more in common with the Thais than with you Russians believe it or not. And you don’t get it. You don’t get why people think and act differently to things in different unexpected ways. You’re not even curious about it. You’re not curious about people. You’re not curious about encounters or events. You’re not curious about things going wrong and why they went wrong. And you take it personally all the time. Everything is straightforward, selfish, simplistic, personal, untrustworthy. Like that’s just hateful, you know. People find that kind of thing hateful. It’s like you always lead with ego and never with understanding. “I’ve done these things for you and so you should appreciate them”. Sure. But what if I’m exasperated with the endless displacement and postponement of your confession of love for me? That it’s just another way to offload your feelings without doing anything about them and making anything materialised? Maybe I have an intellectual viewpoint here. Maybe I value a romantic pragmatist over an idle fantasist. Maybe I value efficiency over procrastination. Maybe I value people who take chances over people who are fearful. Maybe I view your romantic schemes to be morally dubious and irresponsible. Have you ever thought of these things? Ever been curious about my thoughts and my ideas? What I value and what I think and what I feel? Because what you do instead is to dismiss everything going on with me and proclaim loudly, “she’s ungrateful and selfish and she hates me!”. That’s all the thoughts that run through your head because that’s all the thoughts that run through any Russian head.

You still refuse to interact with me or understand me when you keep clinging onto that fear without any regard for what I need and want. It’s like only your feelings and thoughts and viewpoints and experiences matter and I figure somewhat as a decorative ornament within them. This is literally what Russian people do to one another. This is what infuriates me. And it is this internal lack that dwarfs all the expensive shrines in my name. Maybe they don’t figure as largely because it is NOT the thing I value because I am NOT a Russian who would value such things in and of themselves. Have you ever thought this way? Do all Russians value materialised wealth especially in romantic idolatry? You know, your thinking as per your culture is so primitive it becomes so homogeneous and predictable such that the moment someone deviates from it then they are devious in some way. They are treasonous. They are ungrateful. They have hidden motives. Don’t you see how simplistic the authoritarian culture makes you? How judgemental and incurious and egoistical? It’s just so exhausting dealing with someone like this. Why can’t you be open-minded and charitable and curious? You cannot appreciate the diversity in people’s thoughts and experiences because it’s so different from what you know. And it bleeds through your interactions with me all the time.

Why does it have to be messy and senseless? Don’t you think that puts you in the negative with me? Why does it have to be so difficult and painful? I know Russians don’t care about such a thing because they have no moral sensitivity and concern. I haven’t seen any of you exhibit them. But it matters to me. Do you register that? I’m not saying this as an insult. I’m saying this as a piece of information you need to know about me. You need to register, grasp, and understand this important detail because it speaks to who I am. I’ve been trying to understand you all this time and you couldn’t be bothered to do the same for me. All you write is about your goddamn feelings. Over and over and over. You never registered what I said. You didn’t know or care why I said them. I’m not even human to you.

— Salisa to Anton, August 4th, 2026

Do they know that you don’t care about them? That you couldn’t give less fuck about what happens to them or their loved ones or their country they have been working so hard to protect? That you couldn’t give less fuck about me either? That you couldn’t work up the courage to fuck me even? Do they know all this about you? Is there a rumour swirling around in that circle to elucidate the cause and aim of that terror attack they have been a victim of? To make clear why that was and why it had to be? Why their families were targeted? Why it was personal and bloody and shocking and tragic? Do they know that it was a completely justified retaliation against you for what you’ve chosen to do to me or don’t do to me for the last twelve months or so?

Maybe I was wrong thinking you’ve been given infinite chances to redeem yourself. Do you think your friends are going to get rid of you for real this time? Was I fawning to the wrong person today? Maybe it wasn’t going to happen after all, you know. You and me. Maybe it has been wishful thinking on both our parts that couldn’t be materialised for a reason not clear to anyone.

But I doubt it. I think those who went to the birthday banquet were a few ranks below you and so nothing’s going to change with us. And instead of admitting to some form of oversight or responsibility and doing something to fix the situation, your friends are going to have a violent spasm in retaliation because that’s the Russian way. It isn’t to make the suffering go away for themselves and make the situation better next time. It is to make it worse and worse for everyone else also. It’s been like this forever. I’ve completely mastered Russian psychology.

— Salisa to Anton, August 2nd, 2026

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I can tell you after Lindsey’s funeral my soul left my body. It is one thing to be raving into the void and spinning yarn in my own head […]. It is another to have my suspicion confirmed and corroborated beyond doubt. By the United States government. How do you think that makes me feel? I can tell you I feel saner knowing I may have been insane. Because the actual truth is a hundred times more painful.

Look, if you’re worried about me compromising you I can tell you right now we don’t have to talk about your work. […] Pretty sure I’m worth more to them than what I can get you to spill anyway. Besides I don’t like lying and I don’t like being two-faced. Which is why I’m livid at you writing one thing and saying another. That’s lying. That’s dishonesty. Call it a game or a tactic it doesn’t make any difference. You’re still being dishonest and disrespectful to me. I won’t lie to you (and I get punished by you ALL the time for being authentic with what I say and feel which displeases you and you find that problematic as opposed to symptomatic – something to make go away and something to react to as opposed to something that has gone wrong somewhere which you’re supposed to be curious about and then fix so it won’t happen again which is what grown men do elsewhere in the world but completely eludes you and your bumfuck culture) but you still lie to me. I know in your culture people say things they don’t mean ALL the time for whatever reason. You have to be careful with what you say. You can never be honest with what you say. All social relationships are hierarchical and exploitable. Family members rat out to the secret police and lovers play each other. This is the NORM for you Russians. It is NOT the norm ELSEWHERE in the world. Elsewhere in the world you would be referred to a clinician for your extreme maladjustment. Which is why I say to you: you can never get me. You can’t. You just can’t. Your culture makes you weak and brittle and unprincipled and mean-spirited. You don’t realise you’re being these things but that’s how other people not from your culture see you. Compulsive liar. Duplicitous. Antisocial. Narcissistic. Shallow. Empty. Selfish. You embody these traits and your worldviews are thoroughly tainted by your fellow Russians and what you all do to one another. Why do you think Russian people look so miserable compared to the rest of the more developed world? Have you ever been curious about this? Your faces don’t show any emotions. Easily angered. Easily triggered. Socially retarded. Deeply disconnected from one another and from your environments wherever you are. Generally an unhappy disposition and incurious and distrustful and judgemental and narrow-minded. You’re Russian to a T. And you don’t care about anyone else but yourself and have very little insight to better yourself and everyone around you. The most Russian trait of all.

It is not a problem for me as long as you are honest with me about what you want and you don’t intentionally lie and you don’t raise your voice in my presence. I can handle the rest. You have to always talk. Use your words before emotionally reacting to things. Describe your emotions in simple terms. Just say, “I’m upset. I don’t want to talk now. Let’s talk later.” It is important to say “Let’s talk later” to indicate you want to still repair things. Don’t say “I have no plan to..” and leave it at that. There’s nothing wrong with just saying that if you want to be devoid of any emotional content while also signalling social disinterest. People say things not to be merely descriptive but to also convey intents and wishes and desires. Do you see how much I’m pouring into you on how to make social conversations 101? But then you don’t like me. Every time I move closer to you, you push me away while also killing people and isolating me and bankrupting me. And so it seems apt that instead of seeing sparks fly we see detached limbs fly especially of the daughters and the wives of some of your powerful friends. But maybe it was an inside job and an internal strife. Who could know for sure? You don’t yourself, do you? Your friend(s) would lie to you, wouldn’t they? To deceive you and manipulate you? To make you fearful? To keep you in line? Do you see what that does to your mind and your person over time? To live in a world full of doubts and deceits? For the record, I would trust your friend and what he says to me in private. Because you should be able to compartmentalise your professional life from your private life and I trust that in a genuine relationship where vulnerabilities and emotions take centre stage you should be honest with one another without judgement and without fear because respect and honesty and acceptance make a relationship. That’s literally all that there is to a relationship.

— Salisa to Anton, August 2nd, 2026

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A nation which breeds weak pathetic men with no spine and no courage and no honour and no respect for truth is a nation that will self-destruct on its own although we’re willing to give you a helping hand of course. Last dying spasms of a declining empire on its deathbed. Is that why there are signals going off everywhere worldwide and you’re wrecking senseless havoc almost indiscriminately? Do you think that will ennoble you? What you’re doing? Do you think that’s your empire on the way up or on the way down? Do you think the West has anything to lose either way? On the one hand, they back down and you’re back to preserving the rotten ignominious misery that even wealth and power couldn’t erase because the racial condition is so ingrained in your nationhood and so much worse than death itself. On the other hand, they keep going and you start to fracture at the seams and in that process the rotten ignominious misery increases tenfold in intensity and scale and who knows what’s going to happen afterwards. If I don’t have any way out, then neither do you.

You know, in a way you don’t get it either. You think I should fall at your feet no matter what because love triumphs all. You think my mental resistance is a sign of my rejection of you. That’s because Russians are uniquely and thoroughly self-obsessed people. They cannot see beyond themselves and their immediate selfish needs. Hell, if families can do that to one another – Andre to his wife and his wife to Andre, mothers to their sons sending them off to die in a war they don’t care for, wives to their husbands for the death benefits and girlfriends to their boyfriends for the fake-ass glory, you who claim to love me but rape me and abuse me so casually – then what’s the point of me trying to whip up your nobler sentiments and your love towards your countrymen and your love for your nation and your love for peace and your love for humanity? Which was why I told your friend that his stock was psychopathic. It is not in any way normal or human or healthy to be behaving and thinking in this way. You take my moral disgust towards your mass murdering habits as a sign of my rejection of you. You take my normal human responses to abuse and coercion as a sign of my rejection of you. You take my unenthusiasm and reluctance as a sign of my rejection of you. Because in your cultural understandings, as long as I BENEFIT from the money you steal and the post you kill from, there is no reason for a girl to want to reject you unless she doesn’t like you. That’s the logic. It’s the logic of pure naked venal self-interest and deep rotting moral corruption.

Do you know what the tipping point was for me? When I began to see it for the first time how rotten and irredeemable you all are at core? When your other friend [..] tweeted something about Armenia straddling two chairs – one of the EU and one of your country – and how she will fall embarrassingly flat on her ass. Do you know that he tweeted that the day after I suggested a polyamourous relationship between you and your friend? He missed the fact that it was his men who seeded my head with “polyandry” and so groomed me for such an idea to begin with, months and months prior. He missed the fact that I only suggested “straddling” two men because one had just […] when I talked to another who had been threatening to kill my ex if I ignored him and who had previously […] in the United States precisely because I ignored him. Your friend […] thought I “desired” such an idea of entertaining the two men because that’s the reason a Russian person would do anything. They would only do things which they desire which only they themselves benefit. There’s nothing more to it than that. There’s no wider considerations at play. Nothing about people. Nothing about peace. Nothing about ethics. Nothing about sacrifice. Nothing about how an extremely coercive situation invalidates any consent given and how I cannot be said to “want” or “desire” any of these things. This came on the heels of your supreme friend retaliating against me for trying to save the life of the man whom I loved who assumed I was betraying him or playing him. This came after you assuming that I wanted to see you in person so I could use sex to influence you even though I was doing it to try to save everyone, your people included. It is this narrow field of vision and interest – of people doing things that please them, that benefit them, that exploit others – that defines Russian psychology. You people are not able to understand human behaviours in all its depth and complexity, because Russian people do not possess such depth and complexity in themselves. Their behaviours are primitive. Their thinking corresponds to their behaviours. And this realisation was somehow a life raft. Because I couldn’t understand what was going on at the time. What was being thought and felt and carried out and why. It made no sense to me whatsoever. Until it occurred to me that I was dealing with a group of people who were so foreign to us and so beneath us and so unlike us. A group of people without any of the moral or psychological or intellectual layers I’ve been so used to. And that’s when everything sort of shifted. With that kind of deep astounding limitation of human understanding and human psychology, the wiggle room is extremely small. Because their understanding and their psychology are small.

— Salisa to Anton, August 3rd, 2026

I know it’s not my place and I’ve been completely unhinged in a bad way since the funeral, probably sometime before […], but you should consider stopping the war if you could. You wouldn’t be a weaker man for it but a stronger one. I do mean it. To be honest I don’t want to be a part of this anymore and as I said to Sasha a few weeks ago you all could nuke each other for all I care. But I feel I have to say this. If the Chinese (unofficially) and the Americans (officially) agree on something, perhaps it is a good time to take a pause and listen, sweetie. It is not about you or the ideas in your head, you know that. Your ideas are too entrenched and too unmalleable to be of any worth. They are calcified as hard facts. At first I did believe in you waging the war for the obvious “existential” reason but after everything that happened between you and me and the psychology I’ve been witnessing up-close I’m beginning to seriously doubt that. And even if it started as that, it has now mutated to actually threaten you existentially. Though I’m not sure if the information I’ve been exposed to is Western propaganda but I trust the officials at the highest level – the heads of state on the same level as you – making the moves to try to temper your downward path of senseless destruction. I’ve read that it was not in the best interests of the U.S. to have a weakened Russia being sold for parts and subsumed under China. Maybe they could move a needle on your behalf, who knows. And even if they push for a hard bargain, what’s wrong with accepting it? The Russian psychology of strength-weakness dichotomy makes no sense to me. No one in the wider world calls a man strong for being a distempered wreck, especially a senselessly or even purposefully violent one. Strength radiates outward through selfless actions and not destructive actions. Strength in a man of real worth is emotional strength. I fear your idea of strength is merely egoistical. It is crass and selfish and self-aggrandising. I fear also that you would rather go down with the ship in the same way Jim Jones took his people down with him when he didn’t need to. His ego was so intertwined with his community he could no longer separate his sense of self from the welfare of his flock. He felt the little society he built up was a part of him – a big part of him and his ultimate life purpose. He felt that he owned them but was also responsible for them. The idea of himself became so enmeshed with that of his people and when his mind started to deteriorate the living conditions of his people did also because he took it out on them and made things worse for them. And that’s what Jonestown was about. The man as the creator and the destroyer of human lives. He uplifted them like they were everything in his world and tore them down in one act of cruelty as if they were nothing in any world. But you are not like that. I don’t believe you are that. I know there’s a slim but serious chance that the West couldn’t be stopped at this point (though your biggest ally China doesn’t think so and so I trust their judgement on this) but you have to have faith in people and you have to believe in real actual changes. One thing I’ve learned interacting with you and your people is that you are so fixed in your way and you always see the worst in everything. Everything is a threat, a lie, a deception, a manipulation. True perhaps for your culture but not universally true elsewhere. And as I’ve said before, that just because they started the expansion doesn’t necessarily mean they don’t regret it. The rest of the world feels guilt, remorse, responsibility, and complicity. Whereas your culture is so brutal and unrelenting and unapologetic no one would admit fault in themselves however miserable that made them and everyone around them. You cannot project your culture and your experiences within it as something that represents the whole world. And though there are people who want to see you go down, not everyone does. And that ‘not everyone’ is your sliver of hope. And you have to try, sweetheart. You can still turn this around. There is no need to go down the path of further destruction. I fear you have gone into a catastrophic mode of thinking and feeling after being paralysed and traumatised by something you yourself brought about and you hated yourself for that. But that’s just something that exists within you. You don’t need to radiate that outward especially because it’s a self-feeding loop. The more you radiate it the more it becomes real and the more it is perpetuated and amplified and cyclical. One thing you can do to get rid of that anger and hatred is perhaps to change the situation that went awry because of you for the better. To alleviate the misery you brought about and atone for your actions. That’s how the festering self-loathing goes away. You fix the outer to alleviate the inner. Ultimately it is you who benefits.

I don’t know why I’m writing out all this. Maybe for the first time I realised you misunderstood my “overture” to be a musical prelude which an overture also is and so I should have been more generous in my interpretation of you. Though to be honest, I still want to see you go down and now is as good a time as any. I think the authoritarian model of governance brings out the worst in humanity that it’s no longer just a “political” issue but a uniquely “human” one. I think your culture and your people are incurable. To cure the temperament of your people and the mood of your culture is to cure the anomaly of authoritarianism and so it would never be permitted to happen. To shatter the ills of your society, you would have to shatter the state that governs it. For that, your state as we know it would have to be dissolved. Whether that should be through internal or external upending remains to be seen. And that’s probably why I wrote what I did earlier. I wanted you to be understood on a human level which is something you would never experience in your lifetime in a culture so antithetical to human compassion and human dignity and human psychology. And in a way what I wrote would fall on deaf ears because your temperament shaped by your culture would not permit you to understand it or act on it in the same way none of what I said to Anton seems to have been registered by him. It fuels my anger and disgust even more. If only he was raised in a better, more civilised, less authoritarian culture, I and no one else would have to suffer because of it. If only you… none of us would have to suffer from it. It’s all related, don’t you see?

— Salisa to Путуки, August 2nd, 2026

Do you think love for a person trumps love for humanity? Do you think what you have shown me is love? What your friend has shown me is? That’s a “no” on two counts. Neither of you even care to show me a gesture of kindness. Do you really think me asking for a small sum of money to survive for another month is me being a nag all this time? Do you understand what a symbolic gesture means? So why should I help you? Why would I want to? If the culture and the nation raise you to be so monstrous and treasonous such that you lack the most basic ingredient of what makes you a “human” as well as a good “citizen” and a good “ruler”, then why should it stand? Why shouldn’t we be applauding what’s happening to your country?

Do you think love for oneself trumps love for humanity? Do you think love of my own life should take precedence over that of other lives and of humanity as a whole? You don’t even think that way. You’re not even capable of thinking in selfless abstraction. It is not even your life we are talking about. It is your egoistic selfish needs. It is your ego and not your life. The love of one’s ego should trump the love of humanity and world peace and actual human lives. This is where you are at. This is where you stand. I think we should hack away at your legs, no?

Do you think that perhaps Andre’s ex wife who aborted two of his children in secret while being married to him was the result of him not listening to her or respecting her needs? Or was it the result of her not communicating those needs to him? Did she tell him beforehand she never wanted to have kids and he refused to respect her decision and her bodily autonomy? Did she not tell him because she selfishly wanted both him and a childfree marriage and so deceived him? Did he go stealth in hope of impregnating her against her own wishes? Who deceived who? Who was dishonest to who? Who was taking advantage of who? Why are you people so wretched to one another? So selfish? So disrespectful? So unable to love and care and communicate? So unable to reason or compromise or negotiate? In loving relationships no less. In marriages. In love. The foundation of family and children and all that’s good and holy in this world.

— Salisa to Anton, July 19th, 2026

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Did you guys kill Lindsey Graham to make a statement? That’s gotta be one of the stupidest moves you could ever possibly make. You do know that he’s well-regarded and well-respected across the aisle within the highest echelons of American politics, right? I know this because all the leftist night hosts and comedians barely had anything bad to say about him and it was always good-natured and respectful though they openly ridicule other Republicans all the time in a personal way too I might add. This is what happens when you live in a society deeply lacking in both emotional and social intelligence. You miscalculate the human dimension in the worst of ways. You don’t know why what you’ve been doing to me is egregiously bad and why what you did to Graham is going to fan the flame and make everything much, much worse. I did have a sinking feeling in my stomach when I saw his picture in the news holding that drone in Ukraine smiling gleefully into the camera the day before he passed, the way I did when I saw the Reddit headline of Ursula von de Leyen publicly using the “predator” label and that post was at the top of my feed. Well, I sincerely hope they don’t stop now. Wherever I maybe and whatever will happen to me I do hope the gloves never come back on.

It was that photo of him that got him killed, wasn’t it? It wasn’t the sanctions bill. You could have killed him much sooner or you could have stalled it or undercut its implementation and enforcement in a much less overt manner. You could have found a way to work around it or work with it. You didn’t really have to kill him. But you did in the heat of the moment without any regard for consequences. Remember Congressman Leo Ryan of Jonestown? The one executed in cold blood at the Port Kaituma airstrip because Jones couldn’t stand to have his authority undermined and challenged by another powerful man? Say what you want about American politicians being corrupted but don’t we all find someone like him and Lindsey Graham indelibly remarkable? True heroes of the people? You would have been a hero for your people if you were to silence him for the bill he pushed for. But that’s not why you did it. You did it for the same reason Jim Jones did.

— Salisa to Anton, July 20th, 2026

This is a distinctive and unique evil.  It has always been driven by a hatred above all else, a hatred for civilization itself.  It is a revolt of the worst against the best, a revolt of the weak and the cowardly against the strong and the good.  It is perpetrated by those who cannot build, who cannot create, who cannot achieve great things, and take their revenge upon the world for their own inadequacy by seeking to destroy those who can.  This is what radical leftism is.  It may wear various different slogans and ideologies across place and time.  They can call themselves anti-capitalist or anti-imperialist or communist or anarchist or Marxist.  But the fundamental character is always the same.  It’s always the same. 

It is a poisonous resentment cloaked in the language of equality and justice and liberation, an overwhelming need to tear down what greater men have built, to wreck what is beautiful and what is right on behalf of people who are only filled with ugliness and have nothing else to offer the world.  Through violence and through terror, they once again seek to impose their ugliness on all of us.  The old dogma was wrong.  The old dogma was wrong; none of this is driven by idealism.  It is not utopian.  In fact, it is the opposite. 

One of the criticisms you sometimes hear of communism, for example, is that it sounds good in theory, but it never works in practice.  That’s actually not true.  Communism does not sound good in theory.  The world it envisions for all of us is small, flat, grey, leveled of all exception, drained of all that is good and noble in the human soul.  The world it envisions is a world without courage, a world without creativity or ambition, a world without heroes or glory or great causes to strive towards, without – a world without miracles, without myths, without men who rise above the rest to do incredible and extraordinary things.  And the world communism envisions is a world without God. 

For these architects of revolutionary violence, the towering achievement of our civilization – for them it’s an unbearable humiliation, a reminder of what they cannot do and a reminder of what they cannot be.  So they choose instead to destroy.  They attack pipelines; they attack railroads; they attack power grids and laboratories, the physical embodied symbols of power and invention and achievement.  This is the nature of the terrorism we face today.  They despise the West because the West is great.

— Marco Rubio: The Resurgence of Political Terrorism, July 16th, 2026

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Inevitably, left to run its course, it always becomes a gulag. It always becomes the mass imprisonment of political enemies, the stripping of their rights and freedoms, inflicting immense pain, humiliation, suffering in order to establish complete and total control – control through psychological and physical and actual terror. And we have to understand that that is the scope and the extent of the threat that we face.

[…]

But let’s not pretend for a moment that these radical leftists, these terrorists, are operating from a place of sincere political conviction.  Sure, there are plenty of useful idiots that they use who may believe these discredited ideologies.  The leftist is fundamentally motivated by envy, by hatred, by jealousy.  The leftist looks at what is beautiful and what is good and what is natural and is filled with envy and hatred.  The leftist looks at a perfect family with a perfect life and a perfect job and perfect kids that goes to church every Sunday and is filled with a feeling of inadequacy and jealousy, and they covet.  And they turn those emotions ultimately into a desire to subjugate, to oppress, and to inflict pain and suffering.

It’s not a coincidence that when you look at these violent antifa demonstrations and you see any photograph of those who were assembled – to be blunt, not one of the people that is demonstrating looks like a normal person.  Not one looks normal.  They’re all deformed in some way – in their appearance, in their dress, in their mannerism.  Why is that?  Why?  If you look at two photographs and you see a normal American in the street and you see an Antifa protest, why do the people that are violently demonstrating – why is there not one normal-looking person among them? Every one of them, through the course of their life and their decisions, has scarred their body and their appearance in many different ways, to the point in which their outer appearance becomes a manifestation of their inner hatred.

Trust your instincts to all people and across all civilizations.  You know what normal is.  You know what beautiful is.  You know what good is.  You know that families are right.  You know that children are precious and beautiful and must be protected.  You know that the criminal and the junkie and the predator is a threat to normal, healthy living.  This is so much deeper than issues about taxation and regulation, although they’re incredibly important.  It’s about normal, healthy, ordered living. 

And the violent leftist, for these deep-seated reasons, going back to the earliest wisdom taught to us in the Bible about coveting – and I’m not talking about rich versus poor.  I’m talking about a much deeper kind of coveting – coveting people who are morally superior, who are superior in the simple, truthful way they live their lives, people that they look at who are happy and ordered and peaceful and contributing to their communities.  That burns an ember in them, and that’s how you end up with the horrors we’ve seen throughout history, where good families are dragged out into the street and executed. 

— Stephen Miller: The Resurgence of Political Terrorism, July 16th, 2026