And you brought him into my life to begin with! You’re responsible for him raping me and stalking me and abusing me. Yet you choose to do nothing about it. You have chosen to look on without offering me a helping hand or a refuge or protection of any kind. And you claim to love me? In what way is this love? If this is love, then it means Russian men aren’t truly capable of love. Or care. Or decency. You leave me to fend for myself! A defenceless vulnerable girl against an all-powerful man who raped her and hurt her over and over. And you choose to stand by and watch! The girl you love! […] Men across the world who don’t even know me care more about me and my wellbeing than you did. They try to protect me from Anton more than you ever did. They fire missiles for me while you can’t even lift a finger to accomplish the same goal.
— Salisa to Путуки, June 26th, 2026
How many times do I have to say: don’t displace, don’t outsource, don’t insinuate, don’t postpone, don’t be oblique? If one of your two Kremlin cucks wants to say something to me, they can say it directly to me. How many times have I said this? How many times have you all been dunces and dimwits about it? Who wants to be a queen to a bunch of dunces and dimwits? That’s like residing in majesty over the fake-ass Potemkin village. You all don’t need to remind me how flaky your big fannies in charge are whom I have to deal with everyday and how you have to groom me because you’re too fearful to talk sense into them. This is probably the norm for you but it just enrages those who don’t live in your society and possess none of your mentality. I bet this is why diplomacy has never worked in your favour in the past few decades. It’s frustrating and exasperating dealing with your kind of usual bullshit. I mean, I’m usually generous with people’s limitations and deception is the name of the game but good lord it is so pure senseless retardation sometimes. It’s like “why?”. Why don’t they listen? Why don’t they get it? Why don’t they respect decorum and customs and decency? Why do they behave this way? Why are they so confusing and confused? Do they even understand human language? Can they make inferences from what you say and gesture because inferences make up the bulk of human comprehension whereas actual words and letters count for very little? How do you even begin to bridge that gap between these incomprehensible senseless brutes and the rest of the world?
I think Bubu Dudu memes reappearing set me off more than anything. Like, why? Get it together, will you all? At least with me and Anton we’re moving on from what it was before and you could see us softening up for a proper opening. But with your friend, it’s like we’re back at the beginning of it all over and over again. Like why? Didn’t I tell you just a few days ago I couldn’t bring myself to do it anymore? If he just wants my attention, now is not a good time since I’m repairing things with Anton. If you want me to see him, you know exactly how you can bring that about and ultimately it rests on me whether I want to take up the offer but you know what you could do to bring it about. But you’re not doing that. Instead you’re back to grooming me with the memes and it’s like “why?”. What’s the purpose of it? What’s the use of it? Do you guys ever think anything through?
And all the extra fluffs and love messages, what’s the purpose of it? I don’t want to see them. I don’t even know who’s behind these things. Is it Anton’s friend? That would make some sense. If so, I don’t want to see them. If you want to see me to repair things, take a leap of faith and man up for once and do what you should have done for the past six or so months. I even flew to Moscow for god’s sake. Now you want to sabotage my chance with someone else to make yourself feel better about your own cowardice which is just another face of the same cowardice and a continuation of the same cowardice? And what did I say about all this? You have all the power to make the polycule happen if that’s what you want. No one’s stopping you. No one can stop you. I even proposed it myself only to get the heat from Medvedev, didn’t I? And I asked you to solve the problem of Anton. Silence about that too. Like, what do you want? Do you even know? What can you live with? What are you even doing? I’ve been trying to help you all this time. On the romantic front and the geopolitical front. And what did I get? Hesitation and radio silence and violent carnage. Like why? What for? What is going on? I already said to you, and I’ve said everything useful under the sun, that people can tolerate ruthlessness to get what it is that you want, but they cannot tolerate ruthlessness over hesitation and confusion and inaction and inability. And you don’t care what unnecessary mess you’ve made in the process. You’re not a strong person. You exist in a system that never nurtures true strength and ability. And we all know why Anton here has been put in charge of his own domain all these years. He’s spineless and he reveres you. He even said so himself about never becoming an actual threat to his superior. And you’re his superior, aren’t you? You could have him killed anytime, couldn’t you? You could punish him insidiously even if you couldn’t, could you? So why is this still a problem? Why didn’t you do anything before when I was willing? Are you afraid of fading into the irrelevant background again, aren’t you? You don’t know what it takes to be happy and you don’t even know what happiness is even at the epitome of power and wealth and access and you have everything at your disposal to obtain me for yourself and you can’t even do that. Like, what is this? Can anyone help me make sense of things? Didn’t I also say that you could relocate me to Moscow out of the generosity of your heart with no expectation in return and if you want time to work up your magic or courage you have all time in the world and this problem of me would be half-solved because I’d have a good life over there and people will come around even if they’re not happy with it? Wouldn’t that give you enough space, give me future and happiness, give everyone else a sufficient reason to back off and your men a room to breathe easy? Incorporate what it is Anton wants and we might just find a golden mean of a solution. Have you ever thought this way? The middle ground? The essence of the Buddhist soul?
And you have to think in the extremes and act in the extremes while being unsure what it is you want and unsure of how to bring it about with ALL the resources in the world. That’s just hateful. People loathe whatever it is you’re trying to do and whatever it is you’re trying to project. It doesn’t look good, I can tell you that. It hasn’t looked good from the start with the […] and the […] and all that jazz but this has gotta be worse. This is what happens when men don’t have to reason about their motives or their actions. When they don’t have to justify anything to their wives who are second class citizens or their men who are way beneath them. And so they lack the ability to reason altogether. To know themselves altogether. To be coherent and intentional altogether. They just react reflexively for the most part because they can. They lack the rational faculties to engage in a bargain or a negotiation or a compromise or even to understand others from their own points of view. They lack the emotional faculties to understand themselves and regulate themselves because they always externalise their inner turmoil with actions to punish or silence others. They lack the moral conscience to reflect on how much all these sinful “privileges” strip away all that makes them human – cooperative and rational and moral. And this is why nothing I’ve said and nothing I’ve done landed with you and I have said everything useful and done everything helpful, everything literally under the sun in the way that I can, but none of it is obvious to you and none of it resonates. You just don’t “get” it. The same way Anton doesn’t. And you don’t listen to anyone after decades in absolute power because absolute power engenders deafness and stupidity. It’s like, nothing I’ve said has ever been registered or comprehended or acted on. That’s what you get for being part of a culture so uncooperative and irrational and amoral. You lose the essence of what makes a human being.
You may not realise this but people fundamentally despise things that are not rational or coherent. Your mind. Your action. Your decision. Humans are rational beings? The keyword is rational. You’re not being rational. You don’t even know what it is to be rational when you never have to be. When you can always mum the final words and people automatically fall in line. Or you reason badly like Anton did without the rational, emotional, and moral faculties that would have been developed elsewhere to help him reason better and more clearly and holistically and compassionately. And you’re not restrained or respectful because you never have to be. Combine the lack of rationality and restraint and respect and you have something akin to a Russian psychology. And you embody them all too well above the herds you rule over and the system you’re trying so hard to preserve. What good would come out of it? Trying to preserve that which hurts you and dehumanises you and others in equal parts? Like, I get it that you all have been adversaries for nearly a century and you cannot trust them who try to undermine you, but do you ever wonder why? Because they are hostile and greedy and rotten? That’s what you’ve been feeding your populace but I want to know whether you actually believe it. Is that what you actually believe? I mean, their behaviours are, in appearance, those things – the way they are projected and understood by you – but do you know what their deeper motives are, in essence, and in what place they originate from and with what principle they take shape and develop? Sweetheart (apologies for using this word again), you’re smarter than this and you’re better than this. I don’t really know what’s what in this information fog of war and what’s from your posse and what’s actually from you but I think you’re truly misguided and misunderstood at quite a fundamental level. Everyone misunderstands you, that much is obvious. But you are misguided even with such genuine intentions for your country. That’s gotta be a deep painful realisation knowing that the system you’ve been trying your whole life to protect ends up eroding all that makes human and all that makes humans happy and thriving and prosperous.
And you make no sense at all. That’s why I’m fucking angry. I try so hard to understand you because understanding something helps you hate it less. And I don’t want to hate you. I’m not in a position where I can hate you without the gnarly gruesome consequences and that’s why I don’t and you can even say it’s the only reason I don’t. But you’re pushing it with all these things you’re doing. I get that you’re pathologically obsessed with me and nothing you do makes much sense because it comes from that place of vulnerability and fear and longing and loneliness. But as I’ve said, I’ve done and said everything under the sun to help you. Those advice still stand, don’t they? They are still applicable and useful, aren’t they? You’re never going to listen to them, are you? Then piss off, will you?
Where have you been all these six months? I persisted with you knowing it could have fallen through by the end of it but I still did it, didn’t I? How many times have you failed me with your inaction? Five? Six? This is what you get with rich men they’ve become so complacent and thoroughly stupid and irresponsible and childish and they suffer no consequences for their own inner lack when they benefit from the external abundance. Also, a giant brothel is your country. Here in Thailand we’re known for that, an unfortunate consequence of our Vietnam military installations but it’s limited to the paupers and the actual pimps. Not so much over there from the elites to the middle class to the hand to mouth it is a cultural thing to take a man for what he’s got and not who he is and a woman for what she’s got and not who she is. That’s literally what prostitution is. […] But Russian stupidity prevents you from seeing that clearly. See? It makes me rage dealing with someone so silly without any perspective it’s so stupid it’s astounding.
And I had to battle my actual visceral fears to come see you, do you know that? And what fears did you battle keeping me at a distance all this time? Man, I’ve never known, throughout my life, men as weak as you and men as weak as Anton. And not just weak but also stupid and fearful. And can’t you see outside yourself and your feelings just for once? Can’t you see me? Innocent people? People who get hurt in the process? All because of you? No remorse about them either? No care for them either? Like, what? What is this we’re dealing with? Are you even real?
You have no mental fortitude. You mistake aggression for fortitude the same way you mistake aggression for strength. And you have no understanding of anything or anyone outside your own self. Anyone else would have extended a hand to help regardless of how they feel and what have transpired because they could see how much I’ve taken in and how much I’ve endured and how much I’ve suffered and how much I’ve persisted through it all despite all that. Even if they can’t care, they’d be able to appreciate my efforts intellectually and respond to it in kind. That’s not kindness, that’s understanding and responsibility. But you don’t even possess that. You don’t understand anything. You’re not responsible for anything or anyone. This is the kind of men your system and your culture breed, can’t you see that? Aren’t you ashamed of that?
— Salisa to Anton, August 10th, 2026
Salisa lohavittayavikant 