You know all this time I grovel to you because I don’t want you to get into trouble. I don’t want to see you hurt. Or for something to happen to you.. even after everything you did. Because your friends aren’t going to hurt me. I didn’t fear for my life. I fear for you.
— Salisa to Anton, August 5th, 2025
I thought I was writing a love story. I thought, this is Shakespearean. This is biblical, the love these two people had for each other. And so I was writing it from that point of view. Meanwhile, the whole world was viewing it as a crime story and nothing more.
— The Guardian, October 8th, 2025
I remember when I briefly got back together with Sebastian that evening in 2019. I believe it was before 2020 and before Phuket. The evening at his new apartment. The evening when he asked “what are we doing?” and I told him he should leave the country. I remember it distinctly because I could feel that something wasn’t right. […] Could this be the man who was head over heels obsessed with me? It surely didn’t feel like it. Something just wasn’t right with this picture. I think I frowned. Confused. Unsettled. Disappointed. All this time.. all these years.. I think I’ve transposed the obsession of Anton onto the image of Sebastian. Perhaps even before I met Anton in the flesh. Could I have been in love – all this time – with the wrong man? Even if partially so? Was my relationship with Sebastian actually obsessive and intense? My compulsion towards Sebastian, was that real? Or was it just a fiction to make everything fit together because I didn’t have all the pieces of the puzzle yet?
You couldn’t make this stuff up. All very fantastical. Fantastical: fanciful; unreal; whimsical; capricious; fantastic [Merriam Webster 1913].
— Salisa, Journal: July 10th, 2025
Salisa lohavittayavikant 